*All names have been changed to protect the dignity of those involved.
Francesca: I can't believe they're making us do that. That's ricockulous!
Mollie Sue: Francesca, you WOULD be the one to use a 50-cent SAT word while we're on vacation in Costa Rica.
Francesca: Mollie Sue, I made that word up. It's "ridiculous" mixed with "cock."
(Carmen and San Diego decided that today was That's a Bit Gay Day. Thus, they came up with various things that are a Bit Gay, announcing them in a British accent)
Carmen: I got a manicure. That's a Bit Gay.
San Diego: I bought a man purse. That's a Bit Gay.
Professor, mimicking his son in falsetto: I borrowed money from my dad! That's a Bit Gay!
Mollie Sue: I can't hold a grudge. I just can't! I'm incapable.
Professora: What if I punched you in the face?
In class we played a game where we named our three favorite animals, in order of preference. mine were:
1. sparrow
2. octopus
3. elephant
Then we did something special with them, but I won't tell you what until you comment with your favorite animals, in order of favoriteness. What are they?
On a tangent, today's interesting Website du Jour is this: If Abraham Lincoln had an iPod.
As a footnote, happy birthday to me and my sister deer.
1.6.09
Drug Deals, Old Port, Rogue Waves--Does It Ever End?
This weekend we took our exams at 8 a.m. on Friday, then jetted out for Puerto Viejo :) The drive was rather uneventful--no one vommed, we didn't hit anything, and there wsasn't a naked dane party going on in the back of the bus (all of these things happened but one--guess which :P) We drove through the mountain jungle and our tour guide extraordinaire told us all the movies that were filmed in Costa Rica--Jurassic Park, Spy kids 1, 2, and 3, Caribe, Angels, 1492, plus others. Also, Mel Gibson just bought a big ass piece of land there with waterfalls and animals all over the place, so there are bound to be more movies. Coool :)
We got to our hotel, which was...interesting, to say the least. We were paired 9 girls to 1 room with 7 beds, so some people were displaced--I avoided the girl politics by sleeping in a hammock in the backyard :) The beach right outside our hotel was black sand--it was gorgeous, with flecks of gold, but the sand fleas were terrible. We walked past a giant barge parked in the surf to the inlet where we played guitar, sang, interpretive danced, played in the surf, and drank guaro right out of the bottle--pura vida :)
That night we found a bar right next to the hotel that used to serve food, but a new guy took over ownership 5 days before and hadn't opened the kitchen yet. He was still really nice--he served us free chips and mango salsa, plus gave me free drinks because it was my birthday weekend :) Well, it was close enough ;) A friend and I went out for sushi at Chile Rojo, which was awesome. We went to a beach bonfire and then went skinny dipping at the hotel pool--until a security guard with a giant gun caught us :P Slept in a hammock under the stars until the rooster woke me up at 4 a.m.--roosters don't seem to belong here, especially in such an Old McDonald way :P
We woke up early on Saturday morning to eat breakfast and leave for our snorkeling trip at Cahuita. We all got outfitted in our snorkel gear (though I and one other girl had to opt for children's flippers because our feet were so small :P) and headed out! We took the boats first to a shallow area with a bunch of different coral communities. A bunch of people saw a nurse shark and a school of barracudas; I saw parrot fish, sea urchins, and those darling little black and iridescent blue spotted fish. We took the boats to another place, a dropoff barrier reef, where some people saw turtles :) We stopped at an island for watermelon and organic pineapple and saw tons of white-face monkeys! I had taken the legs off my glasses so i could tape them to my face and see inside my snorkel mask (resourceful!) but that means I couldn't see anything on land, so all the monkeys looked like worried infants tacked onto furry primate bodies. We also saw a giant gold eyelash viper that, if it bites you, will kill you in an hour. Insane :P I stayed a safe distance away because, without my glasses, I have incredibly poor depth perception...so who knows, I may have been right next to it :P
We ate lunch at a Bob-Marley obsessed cafe with borderline good food, then traipsed to Manzanilla beach for a quick look at the national park. We went back to the hotel and I packed up my little hobo bag--a towel tied to a piece of driftwood--and set out for the beach! I put all my stuff behind a log, but that didn't help--after about a half hour, a rogue wave came and stole all my belongings--wallet. camera, towel, shirt, skirt, shoes, water bottle, towel, wrap, everything! I got it all back (I have no clue HOW) but the camera is done for--sorry mum ;(
There was a rave on the beach on Saturday night, but I fell asleep in a hammock at, like, 10 p.m. and woke up in time to watch the sun rise :) Well, attempt to--it was overcast, so I didn't really see much, but it was cool being almost alone on the beach and watching everything light up :) I spent the day with friends, trekking around the beach, poking in and out of places we'd never visited :) We had a good time, but there were some weird aspects--like, I witnessed a crack deal on the beach; you're not supposed to shake hands with a local because it tells them you want to sleep with them; the guys in our group got a lecture about how they needed to protect us by walking with us wherever we wanted to go, because men hide in the bushes along the road and attack women who walk by themselves; and apparently the rape count last month alone was 7 :l Oh well, we survived :) Pura Vida!
On the way back to school we watched Quantum of Solace, my very first Bond movie! It was good :) We stopped at the same crappy restaurant for lunch, then everyone slept the whole way bck to reggae beats. I swear, our bus driver has the best taste in music in the world. Fun times.
Now we're back in Heredia and starting on our last week of school, and I just know it's going to pass SUPER slowly because I just want to get home! I've loved my time here, and I've had some great adventures and made some awesome friends, BUT I've got a lot waiting on me back home--like an honors thesis :P Oh well, I'll keep you posted this week, then might see some of you back in the states :) Pura Vida!
We got to our hotel, which was...interesting, to say the least. We were paired 9 girls to 1 room with 7 beds, so some people were displaced--I avoided the girl politics by sleeping in a hammock in the backyard :) The beach right outside our hotel was black sand--it was gorgeous, with flecks of gold, but the sand fleas were terrible. We walked past a giant barge parked in the surf to the inlet where we played guitar, sang, interpretive danced, played in the surf, and drank guaro right out of the bottle--pura vida :)
That night we found a bar right next to the hotel that used to serve food, but a new guy took over ownership 5 days before and hadn't opened the kitchen yet. He was still really nice--he served us free chips and mango salsa, plus gave me free drinks because it was my birthday weekend :) Well, it was close enough ;) A friend and I went out for sushi at Chile Rojo, which was awesome. We went to a beach bonfire and then went skinny dipping at the hotel pool--until a security guard with a giant gun caught us :P Slept in a hammock under the stars until the rooster woke me up at 4 a.m.--roosters don't seem to belong here, especially in such an Old McDonald way :P
We woke up early on Saturday morning to eat breakfast and leave for our snorkeling trip at Cahuita. We all got outfitted in our snorkel gear (though I and one other girl had to opt for children's flippers because our feet were so small :P) and headed out! We took the boats first to a shallow area with a bunch of different coral communities. A bunch of people saw a nurse shark and a school of barracudas; I saw parrot fish, sea urchins, and those darling little black and iridescent blue spotted fish. We took the boats to another place, a dropoff barrier reef, where some people saw turtles :) We stopped at an island for watermelon and organic pineapple and saw tons of white-face monkeys! I had taken the legs off my glasses so i could tape them to my face and see inside my snorkel mask (resourceful!) but that means I couldn't see anything on land, so all the monkeys looked like worried infants tacked onto furry primate bodies. We also saw a giant gold eyelash viper that, if it bites you, will kill you in an hour. Insane :P I stayed a safe distance away because, without my glasses, I have incredibly poor depth perception...so who knows, I may have been right next to it :P
We ate lunch at a Bob-Marley obsessed cafe with borderline good food, then traipsed to Manzanilla beach for a quick look at the national park. We went back to the hotel and I packed up my little hobo bag--a towel tied to a piece of driftwood--and set out for the beach! I put all my stuff behind a log, but that didn't help--after about a half hour, a rogue wave came and stole all my belongings--wallet. camera, towel, shirt, skirt, shoes, water bottle, towel, wrap, everything! I got it all back (I have no clue HOW) but the camera is done for--sorry mum ;(
There was a rave on the beach on Saturday night, but I fell asleep in a hammock at, like, 10 p.m. and woke up in time to watch the sun rise :) Well, attempt to--it was overcast, so I didn't really see much, but it was cool being almost alone on the beach and watching everything light up :) I spent the day with friends, trekking around the beach, poking in and out of places we'd never visited :) We had a good time, but there were some weird aspects--like, I witnessed a crack deal on the beach; you're not supposed to shake hands with a local because it tells them you want to sleep with them; the guys in our group got a lecture about how they needed to protect us by walking with us wherever we wanted to go, because men hide in the bushes along the road and attack women who walk by themselves; and apparently the rape count last month alone was 7 :l Oh well, we survived :) Pura Vida!
On the way back to school we watched Quantum of Solace, my very first Bond movie! It was good :) We stopped at the same crappy restaurant for lunch, then everyone slept the whole way bck to reggae beats. I swear, our bus driver has the best taste in music in the world. Fun times.
Now we're back in Heredia and starting on our last week of school, and I just know it's going to pass SUPER slowly because I just want to get home! I've loved my time here, and I've had some great adventures and made some awesome friends, BUT I've got a lot waiting on me back home--like an honors thesis :P Oh well, I'll keep you posted this week, then might see some of you back in the states :) Pura Vida!
28.5.09
las Maras, los Cadillacs, y los Chicos Cansados
This morning was the first morning I have woken up in Costa Rica without a headache. It's gonna be a good day :)
On Monday I started a new class. Technically, since we're supposed to be receiving 6 credits from our studies down here, we're supposed to "change classes" by "starting a new semester" after the second week. On Friday I finished Advanced Conversation, and on Monday I started Advanced Composition. Fortunately, la Professora wants us to concentrate on our final project on Argentina, so she's not yet asigned any major compositions. Gracias a Dios :)
Tuesday night I stayed home and got drunk with my host mum off 40s of Imperial while watching the Heredia v Liberia national finals. She told me I was offcially "Herediana" now; we ate Doritos, popcorn, and peanuts that tasted like lime. Heredia lost in the second half by poorly-placed penalty shots, but we had a great time anyway :) Apparently there was a HUGE concert in San Jose for los Cadillacs, a super-famous band...and no one went because they all wanted to go to the game :P It was incredible: fans stormed the field, people got arrested and left on stretchers. One fan punched a player. We could hear the sirens all night, not to mention the screams of protest coming from the stadium, which is a mile at best from our apartment.
On Wednesday we usually do our group day trips, so we went to Poas Volcano after meeting at the school at 7 a.m. :/ We saw the giant crater with sulfur smoke pouring out of it (which stunk :P) and hiked up to the lagoon, which was gorgeous! Apparently the water there has an acidty comparable to hydrochloric acid. Scary times :/Needless to say, we did NOT go for a skinny dip at Poas Volcano :P
Afterwards we bought strawberries, which are incredible because they're grown in the volcanic soil. I bought some for my host mum because she's such a sweetheart, but I have not yet been home to give them to her :P
We ate lunch at Freddo Fresa's, which had incredible strawberry juice. You could either have it mixed with water or milk, which made it like a smoothie or a milkshake--goood stuff :) I ordered steak, por supuesto, and it didn't disappoint :) Afterwards I found a gift for The Boy--finally. That means my souvenir shopping is DONE and I can use the rest of my money for food! Yesssss :)
After lunch we went back to school--it was so hard to concentrate after having woken up so early and gotten so little sleep (I slept for 2 hours because I had some coffee in the afternoon on Tuesday in an attempt to dilate my blood vessels a little and make my perma-headache go away). In class we talked about gangs, las Maras. The name is especially interesting, because maras are a type of El Salvadorian ant that eat absolutely everything in their path--other ants, larger animals...I think they can even eat people. How quaint, then, to name your gang after them--that's exactly what gangs do, consume everything.
We mentioned, too, the economic crisis, and talked about how it's more of an existential crisis than anything--people are still hell-bent on buying what they want to make themselves appear more well-off, to establish their bodies as entities and make themselves immortal by way of material possessions. Very interesting indeed.
We also talked about dancing (we have 4 hours to fill--we go off on a lot of tangents :P). I said I liked salsa, meringue, and borracha. Unfortunately, the name of the dance I like is "bachata"--borracha means drunk :P On the bright side, the dance teacher is going to make a video with me of all the dance moves, so I can take them home and spread the Good Word of Latin Dance :)
After class (which took FOREVER) we left immediately to go to Miradona Ram Luna, a classy restaurant in the mountains. It had an incredible view of the city lights, and had an all-you-can-eat, all-you-can-drink buffet and open bar, plus traditional dancing and handmade crafts. It was pretty awesome :) One of my friends said he'd tell the vejay it was my birthday (It almost is! And THIS birthday of all birthdays deserves to be celebrated for a week :P), but he got sidetracked talking to a girl and forgot. Thus, I was not included in the birthday song, dance, or cake. I keep having this recurring nightmare that everyone forgets it's my birthday, or doesn't care, and it's really stressing me out. It doesn't help that I don't have many really close friends here, and those who ARE close friends have their own close friends. Oh well, pura vida, I'll just celebrate when I get home :)
Today, another day of class--tomorrow, an exam at 8 a.m., then leaving for the Carribbean for the weekend :) we're cansados, felizes, y listos!
On Monday I started a new class. Technically, since we're supposed to be receiving 6 credits from our studies down here, we're supposed to "change classes" by "starting a new semester" after the second week. On Friday I finished Advanced Conversation, and on Monday I started Advanced Composition. Fortunately, la Professora wants us to concentrate on our final project on Argentina, so she's not yet asigned any major compositions. Gracias a Dios :)
Tuesday night I stayed home and got drunk with my host mum off 40s of Imperial while watching the Heredia v Liberia national finals. She told me I was offcially "Herediana" now; we ate Doritos, popcorn, and peanuts that tasted like lime. Heredia lost in the second half by poorly-placed penalty shots, but we had a great time anyway :) Apparently there was a HUGE concert in San Jose for los Cadillacs, a super-famous band...and no one went because they all wanted to go to the game :P It was incredible: fans stormed the field, people got arrested and left on stretchers. One fan punched a player. We could hear the sirens all night, not to mention the screams of protest coming from the stadium, which is a mile at best from our apartment.
On Wednesday we usually do our group day trips, so we went to Poas Volcano after meeting at the school at 7 a.m. :/ We saw the giant crater with sulfur smoke pouring out of it (which stunk :P) and hiked up to the lagoon, which was gorgeous! Apparently the water there has an acidty comparable to hydrochloric acid. Scary times :/Needless to say, we did NOT go for a skinny dip at Poas Volcano :P
Afterwards we bought strawberries, which are incredible because they're grown in the volcanic soil. I bought some for my host mum because she's such a sweetheart, but I have not yet been home to give them to her :P
We ate lunch at Freddo Fresa's, which had incredible strawberry juice. You could either have it mixed with water or milk, which made it like a smoothie or a milkshake--goood stuff :) I ordered steak, por supuesto, and it didn't disappoint :) Afterwards I found a gift for The Boy--finally. That means my souvenir shopping is DONE and I can use the rest of my money for food! Yesssss :)
After lunch we went back to school--it was so hard to concentrate after having woken up so early and gotten so little sleep (I slept for 2 hours because I had some coffee in the afternoon on Tuesday in an attempt to dilate my blood vessels a little and make my perma-headache go away). In class we talked about gangs, las Maras. The name is especially interesting, because maras are a type of El Salvadorian ant that eat absolutely everything in their path--other ants, larger animals...I think they can even eat people. How quaint, then, to name your gang after them--that's exactly what gangs do, consume everything.
We mentioned, too, the economic crisis, and talked about how it's more of an existential crisis than anything--people are still hell-bent on buying what they want to make themselves appear more well-off, to establish their bodies as entities and make themselves immortal by way of material possessions. Very interesting indeed.
We also talked about dancing (we have 4 hours to fill--we go off on a lot of tangents :P). I said I liked salsa, meringue, and borracha. Unfortunately, the name of the dance I like is "bachata"--borracha means drunk :P On the bright side, the dance teacher is going to make a video with me of all the dance moves, so I can take them home and spread the Good Word of Latin Dance :)
After class (which took FOREVER) we left immediately to go to Miradona Ram Luna, a classy restaurant in the mountains. It had an incredible view of the city lights, and had an all-you-can-eat, all-you-can-drink buffet and open bar, plus traditional dancing and handmade crafts. It was pretty awesome :) One of my friends said he'd tell the vejay it was my birthday (It almost is! And THIS birthday of all birthdays deserves to be celebrated for a week :P), but he got sidetracked talking to a girl and forgot. Thus, I was not included in the birthday song, dance, or cake. I keep having this recurring nightmare that everyone forgets it's my birthday, or doesn't care, and it's really stressing me out. It doesn't help that I don't have many really close friends here, and those who ARE close friends have their own close friends. Oh well, pura vida, I'll just celebrate when I get home :)
Today, another day of class--tomorrow, an exam at 8 a.m., then leaving for the Carribbean for the weekend :) we're cansados, felizes, y listos!
25.5.09
Manuel Antonio, Booze Cruise--you've all been so patient!
I have so much to say.
Opera: We went to Teatro Nacional to see Mil y Una Noches (1001 Arabian Nights) with Sheherazad; it was ok--definitely a cultural experience--but there was a lot of belly dancing, which made me happy :)
Castro's--on Wednesday night we took a bus to San Jose to Castro's, this really classy bar (wit ultra cheap beer!) where we showed off our dancing skillz. Only 3 or 4 guys showed up, all of them blackout drunk, so I found a Tico to dance with--Angelo. He was super good! He kept asking ,"Do you have a boyfriend?" and I kept saying, " Yes," to which he would respond, "Why?" And I'd say in French, "Becuase he's far less annoying than you." Ahh, the magic of multilingualism :P Still, he was a great dancer.
We also had cooking class, where we made this pasty delicious thing with platanos and peppers, cilantro, onions, celery, and other things. We made jewelry, too, and it was hilarious watching all these LAX players stringingh pink beads onto elastic thread for their mums and girlfriends. Yes, dear reader, in fact I DID get pictures of that :)
We've discovered a restaurant here, Chico's, that makes kickass Hawaiian pizza--and the man who runs it grew up in NYC, so he speaks flawless English. Whenever we go there he talks the entire time, going on and on about "the best flag in the world--the stars and stripes!" and how much he misses the States. He's more of an obnoxious American than some of us!
On Thursday when I came home to study for my exam on Friday, my host mum had a friend over. This friend has been there before--and she pointedly ignores me. I'm not sure why I can never understand anything she says...but on Thursday, I determined that it's because she has no teeth. She and my host mum and her three daughters were all pregaming with 40s of Imperial--they all go out together, which is so cute! As a side note, all of my host sisters look like variations of Princess Jasmine. I feel like a pale frump toad in their presence :P
The last time I wrote it had rained really hard; apparently, people actually die when it rains here :l One man was walking across the road and he fell in a manhole (the rain had carried away the cover) and drowned almost instantly with all the crap that was flowing into the sewer below him. Urgh. I will never cross the street in the rain again.
On Friday morning we had our exam at 8 a.m. (shoot me in the face). It was pretty self explanatory. Then we piled on the bus and headed to Manuel Antonio :) We watched a ridiculously bootleg copy of Wolverine; all the really good special effects bits were distilled into grey screens. I'm SO GLAD I didn't pay for it!
We ate lunch beside a river full of crocodiles. I ate one of them. My friends got videos of them eating a turkey--their reflexes are soooo fast, especially for them weighing, like, a million pounds. Scary-awesome. We got to the beach, turned the bus around in an impossibly narrow road, checked into the hotel, and ran to the beach--I almost lost my glasses twice, which would have been ultra bad--I brought nothing else to keep me from being blind down here! We ate dinner at a restaurant called El Avion--it's built around the wreckage of a C-123 Fairchild that went down in Manuel Antonio. Now it's a bar :P We decided to splurge a little; I had peppered ginger mahi mahi and tiramisu. Yessssss.
Later we went skinny dipping. In the ocean. Also in the pool. Too much fun :)
The next morning we went to Parque Nacional Manuel Antonio--we saw monkeys, sloths (in Spanish, osos parasosos--lazy bears :P), snakes, and giant iguanas! I tore myself up on some rocks that we were climbing on, but we had a great time playing in the rip current :) I saw a 3-foot iguana disappear into the pipes below a row of portapotties--you couldn't pay me to choose one of those and lower my naked butt onto a hole that may or may not have a giant iguana face in it!
Saturday afternoon at 1 we went on the booze cruise :) It was an all-you-can-eat, all-you-can-drink, dolphin-and-whale watching sunset cruise. Fun times :) We saw dolphins, though I got no good pictures of them. We got to go snorkeling, and I saw a huge blue puffer fish! Though I couldn't fit the mask on over my goggles, so I may have just imagined the puffer fish :P They fed us really tasty mahi mahi with carrots, potatoes, rice, and chayote, but mostly what mattered to us were the rum punches (lovingly dubbed Happy Juice by the boat crew :P).
That night was ultra fun--we hurried to get ready to go to a bar where ladies drank free from 9 to 11...then looked at the clock and saw that it was only 6:46. Instead we went to the beach, played at the pool (where someone stole my shorts, 2 pairs of my shoes, and my watch), some people went to a bonfire at the beach, and I passed out before midnight watching Fear (starring way-young Reese Witherspoon and Mark Wahlberg).
Sunday, we packed up and headed out--everyone was asleep on the bus in a matter of minutes. Now I'm back home and everything reeks of sand and saltwater--but I've got a nice tan, and an excuse to buy new shoes :)
Opera: We went to Teatro Nacional to see Mil y Una Noches (1001 Arabian Nights) with Sheherazad; it was ok--definitely a cultural experience--but there was a lot of belly dancing, which made me happy :)
Castro's--on Wednesday night we took a bus to San Jose to Castro's, this really classy bar (wit ultra cheap beer!) where we showed off our dancing skillz. Only 3 or 4 guys showed up, all of them blackout drunk, so I found a Tico to dance with--Angelo. He was super good! He kept asking ,"Do you have a boyfriend?" and I kept saying, " Yes," to which he would respond, "Why?" And I'd say in French, "Becuase he's far less annoying than you." Ahh, the magic of multilingualism :P Still, he was a great dancer.
We also had cooking class, where we made this pasty delicious thing with platanos and peppers, cilantro, onions, celery, and other things. We made jewelry, too, and it was hilarious watching all these LAX players stringingh pink beads onto elastic thread for their mums and girlfriends. Yes, dear reader, in fact I DID get pictures of that :)
We've discovered a restaurant here, Chico's, that makes kickass Hawaiian pizza--and the man who runs it grew up in NYC, so he speaks flawless English. Whenever we go there he talks the entire time, going on and on about "the best flag in the world--the stars and stripes!" and how much he misses the States. He's more of an obnoxious American than some of us!
On Thursday when I came home to study for my exam on Friday, my host mum had a friend over. This friend has been there before--and she pointedly ignores me. I'm not sure why I can never understand anything she says...but on Thursday, I determined that it's because she has no teeth. She and my host mum and her three daughters were all pregaming with 40s of Imperial--they all go out together, which is so cute! As a side note, all of my host sisters look like variations of Princess Jasmine. I feel like a pale frump toad in their presence :P
The last time I wrote it had rained really hard; apparently, people actually die when it rains here :l One man was walking across the road and he fell in a manhole (the rain had carried away the cover) and drowned almost instantly with all the crap that was flowing into the sewer below him. Urgh. I will never cross the street in the rain again.
On Friday morning we had our exam at 8 a.m. (shoot me in the face). It was pretty self explanatory. Then we piled on the bus and headed to Manuel Antonio :) We watched a ridiculously bootleg copy of Wolverine; all the really good special effects bits were distilled into grey screens. I'm SO GLAD I didn't pay for it!
We ate lunch beside a river full of crocodiles. I ate one of them. My friends got videos of them eating a turkey--their reflexes are soooo fast, especially for them weighing, like, a million pounds. Scary-awesome. We got to the beach, turned the bus around in an impossibly narrow road, checked into the hotel, and ran to the beach--I almost lost my glasses twice, which would have been ultra bad--I brought nothing else to keep me from being blind down here! We ate dinner at a restaurant called El Avion--it's built around the wreckage of a C-123 Fairchild that went down in Manuel Antonio. Now it's a bar :P We decided to splurge a little; I had peppered ginger mahi mahi and tiramisu. Yessssss.
Later we went skinny dipping. In the ocean. Also in the pool. Too much fun :)
The next morning we went to Parque Nacional Manuel Antonio--we saw monkeys, sloths (in Spanish, osos parasosos--lazy bears :P), snakes, and giant iguanas! I tore myself up on some rocks that we were climbing on, but we had a great time playing in the rip current :) I saw a 3-foot iguana disappear into the pipes below a row of portapotties--you couldn't pay me to choose one of those and lower my naked butt onto a hole that may or may not have a giant iguana face in it!
Saturday afternoon at 1 we went on the booze cruise :) It was an all-you-can-eat, all-you-can-drink, dolphin-and-whale watching sunset cruise. Fun times :) We saw dolphins, though I got no good pictures of them. We got to go snorkeling, and I saw a huge blue puffer fish! Though I couldn't fit the mask on over my goggles, so I may have just imagined the puffer fish :P They fed us really tasty mahi mahi with carrots, potatoes, rice, and chayote, but mostly what mattered to us were the rum punches (lovingly dubbed Happy Juice by the boat crew :P).
That night was ultra fun--we hurried to get ready to go to a bar where ladies drank free from 9 to 11...then looked at the clock and saw that it was only 6:46. Instead we went to the beach, played at the pool (where someone stole my shorts, 2 pairs of my shoes, and my watch), some people went to a bonfire at the beach, and I passed out before midnight watching Fear (starring way-young Reese Witherspoon and Mark Wahlberg).
Sunday, we packed up and headed out--everyone was asleep on the bus in a matter of minutes. Now I'm back home and everything reeks of sand and saltwater--but I've got a nice tan, and an excuse to buy new shoes :)
19.5.09
Perfunctory Passing Pucker
I have sent out postcards, but I have MANY extras--if you want one, email me your address (kali.mccullough@gmail.com) and I will be sure you get one. Let me know when you get it, too, so I can feel that glow of accomplishment :)
Last Friday we hd our first exam, as we are slated to have every Friday...and i got an A! I got a 97%, to be exact, which always comes as a surprise to me--now, I've gotten in the habit of translating from English to French to Spanish, so I'm continually shocked that none of what I'm thinking is getting lost in translation.
I've noticed something since being here which I think is hilarious. It's closely related to the insane honking (cab drivers, men in dump trucks, motorcycles, even bikes). This phenomenon I have lovingly dubbed the Perfunctory Passing Pucker. It happens frequently--you walk past a guy and he just puckers his lips in your direction--but yesterday's PPP really stood out to me. I was walking out of the school to get lunch and I passed a man outside a shoe store. He was up on a ladder, repainting the trim, and he PPPd me--then almost fell of his ladder and caught himself only by sticking his foot in the paint can. In your face, chauvinist pig.
A couple of days ago I went to Mami for lunch, which is this incredible Caribbean (<---I always misspell this--is it 2 r's or 2 b's?) restaurant that ALWAYS has a line. It opens at 11, and by 11:05 there are no tables and you have to take a number and wait. After dance class I walked there by myself (a lot of my friends thought there wouldn't be anything they'd like--but who doesn't like chicken and rice and beans?!). It was about noon, and I got a table all to myself. My Professora had recommended "rice and beans con pescado," which is a completely different thing from "arroz y frijoles con pescado" and, to drink, agua de sapo, or hiel --a ginger-and-honey drink that rocked my world--and everything was awesome. About halfway through the meal I swore i heard someone calling my name, but I brushed it off'--who in Costa Rica knows my name? Turns out it was Dr. G. his son, and his brother , who joined me for lunch. Yessssss, I no longer feel like such a loser!
We passed a park a few days ago with my Professora and she told us it used to have a lot of trees, which is funny because now there's nothing--a couple of poorly-placed park benches and some shrubs. Apparently, in its heyday, it was known as Parque de las Embarazadas--Pregnancy Park--and they cut down all the trees because too many people were having sex under them. Hilarious :)
It rained--HARD--yesterday for the first time; we're talking sounds-like-hail, thunder-and-lightning, car-alarms-screeching, six-inches-of-water-in-the-road rain. It was really refreshing. Of course it happened while I was in class, but I'd much rather it be beautiful weather in the morning (when I'm out of class) and rainy in the afternoons when I'm attempting to be productive.
Yesterday in class we were using the simple future tense and we had to create some futuristic object and describe it using the simple future. I designed a robot named Sakura that has a toaster for a face. It's pretty novel :)
Yesterday a girl in our group got "robbed." Normailly, I wouldn't air-quote it, but this girl totally asked for it. She was texting on her iTouch in the middle of the sidewalk of Heredia, not looking where she was going, and someone took the iTouch right out of her hands. She started yelling at people in the Internet cafe as if it were their fault, screaming for the police. Simple solution: leave it at home. Now she's talking about leaving, which means she's going to go back to the states and tarnish the name of the program because of this one tiny glitch that could SO EASILY have been avoided. Americans.
Today, cooking class at 10, dance class at 11, regular class at 1:30, and tonight we're going to San Jose to see an Opera at the Teatro Nacional. I'll be sure to tell you all about it :)
Last Friday we hd our first exam, as we are slated to have every Friday...and i got an A! I got a 97%, to be exact, which always comes as a surprise to me--now, I've gotten in the habit of translating from English to French to Spanish, so I'm continually shocked that none of what I'm thinking is getting lost in translation.
I've noticed something since being here which I think is hilarious. It's closely related to the insane honking (cab drivers, men in dump trucks, motorcycles, even bikes). This phenomenon I have lovingly dubbed the Perfunctory Passing Pucker. It happens frequently--you walk past a guy and he just puckers his lips in your direction--but yesterday's PPP really stood out to me. I was walking out of the school to get lunch and I passed a man outside a shoe store. He was up on a ladder, repainting the trim, and he PPPd me--then almost fell of his ladder and caught himself only by sticking his foot in the paint can. In your face, chauvinist pig.
A couple of days ago I went to Mami for lunch, which is this incredible Caribbean (<---I always misspell this--is it 2 r's or 2 b's?) restaurant that ALWAYS has a line. It opens at 11, and by 11:05 there are no tables and you have to take a number and wait. After dance class I walked there by myself (a lot of my friends thought there wouldn't be anything they'd like--but who doesn't like chicken and rice and beans?!). It was about noon, and I got a table all to myself. My Professora had recommended "rice and beans con pescado," which is a completely different thing from "arroz y frijoles con pescado" and, to drink, agua de sapo, or hiel --a ginger-and-honey drink that rocked my world--and everything was awesome. About halfway through the meal I swore i heard someone calling my name, but I brushed it off'--who in Costa Rica knows my name? Turns out it was Dr. G. his son, and his brother , who joined me for lunch. Yessssss, I no longer feel like such a loser!
We passed a park a few days ago with my Professora and she told us it used to have a lot of trees, which is funny because now there's nothing--a couple of poorly-placed park benches and some shrubs. Apparently, in its heyday, it was known as Parque de las Embarazadas--Pregnancy Park--and they cut down all the trees because too many people were having sex under them. Hilarious :)
It rained--HARD--yesterday for the first time; we're talking sounds-like-hail, thunder-and-lightning, car-alarms-screeching, six-inches-of-water-in-the-road rain. It was really refreshing. Of course it happened while I was in class, but I'd much rather it be beautiful weather in the morning (when I'm out of class) and rainy in the afternoons when I'm attempting to be productive.
Yesterday in class we were using the simple future tense and we had to create some futuristic object and describe it using the simple future. I designed a robot named Sakura that has a toaster for a face. It's pretty novel :)
Yesterday a girl in our group got "robbed." Normailly, I wouldn't air-quote it, but this girl totally asked for it. She was texting on her iTouch in the middle of the sidewalk of Heredia, not looking where she was going, and someone took the iTouch right out of her hands. She started yelling at people in the Internet cafe as if it were their fault, screaming for the police. Simple solution: leave it at home. Now she's talking about leaving, which means she's going to go back to the states and tarnish the name of the program because of this one tiny glitch that could SO EASILY have been avoided. Americans.
Today, cooking class at 10, dance class at 11, regular class at 1:30, and tonight we're going to San Jose to see an Opera at the Teatro Nacional. I'll be sure to tell you all about it :)
18.5.09
Arenal. Baldi. La Fortuna. Allergies.
This weekend, we packed up early on Saturday morning and headed north to Arenal in the Alajuela district. Some of the girls brough backpacks and duffel bags--even though this was only a 2-day, 1-night excursion. Honestly, ladies?! Really. The bus ride over was pretty uneventful. Oh, except one guy took a dump in the bus. And one girl threw up a lot. But aside from that... :
We stopped first at a giant red church that was made entirely out of metal in Grecia, Costa Rica--there were birds nbesting in all the chandeliers on the inside, and a really cool park out front. Our next stop was the Sarchi Artists' Cooperative (mum! dad! we DID go there!) where we took our pictures next to the largest ox cart in the world. It strikes me as really funny that, of all the Guinness World Records to break, they would choose the biggest ox cart. Do what you know, man.
For lunch we stopped at a steakhouse...right at the foot of Arenal Volcano. I got my picture taken on the back of a giant cement bull with a ladder up one side of it. Tourism is everywhere! We ate lunch in the glorious humidity and watched the point of Arenal emerge (which is apparently a pretty rare occurence because of the rain, clouds, and smoke that usually surround it).
After lunch we went ziplining. I don't believe I have ever had such exhilarating fun in my life. My parents and sister did it when they were here last semester, but it's such a different experience doing it than just hearing about it. We harnessed up (and I got a double pulley to go even faster!), then trekked at a literally 60 degree angle up the side of the mountain to get to the first platform. I never really realized how out of shape I am until that moment. Here are some statistics: there were 12 ziplines. Some of them are 300 meters high. 10 guys got stuck in the middle. 4 girls cried. I saw 1 turkey (?). It rained 0 times...which sucks because I wore my fleece-ish lined raincoat the. Entire. Time. Better safe than sorry? More like, better faint from heat exhaustion at 300 meters above a raging waterfall of death.
After ziplining we got on horses. This felt like a random turn of events; in fact, I'm fairly certain that the horses were just pulled from the rainforest. They definitely weren't trained AT ALL. No one died, though, which is a good outcome.
Baldi Hot Springs was our next stop, which was awesome. We had dinner there, a buffet, then swam (the logic of "all you can eat, then swim" escapes me). The springs were gorgeous--it's kinda a resort, with 3 wet bars (though drinks are $10 each!) and pools ranging from coldish to comfy to boiling. Then we found the waterslides :) One was really fast, one was really slow, and one was really painful. I will only say that it ended badly.
On the way back from Baldi we stopped to see the volcano at night! I saw one sliver of lava snake out of one corner of the crater's mouth, and that's it....but they sell postcards that illustrate buckets and buckets o' liquid hot magma pouring of it, so it MUST be true!
On Sunday morning I woke up more sore than I have ever been in my life! The hiking, the ab crunching, the holding on for dear life when a strap on my harness broke (yes, indeed, it did), the neck cramps from falling asleep in a position I thought unassumable to mankind, and the near-concussing action of that damned waterslide all used their forces against me to make me rue the day I was born...or at least yesterday. We had breakfast at the hotel, then bussed to La Fortuna waterfall where we hiked 600 m down to the falls, swam in the foam underneath it (SO COLD compared to the hot springs!), fed frogs to piranhas (I did not partake in this, but attempted to feed them my fingertips instead, which in retrospect was a disaster waiting to happen), then hiked back up. I wish i could say the hike back up was a breeze and that I did the whole thing while carrying on a conversation with my neighbor. In reality, I'm just going to leave it at this: it was the exact opposite.
I bought one of those cool wrap tapestry things, partially because it had birds on it, and partially because I only brought one outit that had already seen me sweat bullets in a ski jacket in a rainforest canopy AND ride horses AND sleep for hours in a bus...so I was starting to stink. Obviously. Literally, people would not sit next to me on the bus. Haha, more room for me :)
We stopped at a rope swing on the way back from La Fortuna where we made fools of ourselves in deep water. One guy, who can't swim, swung from the rope and landed almost on top of the goggled guy who was there to help push him to shore. Fun times :P
We got back to the hotel and laid in the sun for an hour while our lunch was being prepared. I saw 4 separate landslides down the sides of Arenal--it was so bizarre because you could hear them before you could see them, then all you saw was layers of dust and concentric cirlces where boulders were falling and leaving pockmarks on Arenal's skin. It was awesome. Lunch was (brace yourself) heart of palm salad, grilled sea bass, coconut flan, and strawberry juice. :) Everyone popped a dramamine so we could sleep on the bus, then headed back south. On the way back we stopped for guava, which comes in a seedpod the size of my arm. You suck the white meat off the seed, and Percy compares it to "putting a white mouse in your mouth." Thanks, Percy. We also tried yucca bread, which is awesome, and pariña (i think), which is like a giant hard crusty pancake that you eat with molasses. Yum.
The change of climate from Heredia to Alajuela really messed with my head--I haven't felt this lethargic since November. I need to perk up, though, because we have 3 dance lessons, a cooking class, a jewelry class, an opera, a trip to Cafe Britt, and a 3-day, 2-night beach trip planned for this week...not to mention 5 classes and an exam. Ugh! Wish me luck.
Also, a shoutout.
We stopped first at a giant red church that was made entirely out of metal in Grecia, Costa Rica--there were birds nbesting in all the chandeliers on the inside, and a really cool park out front. Our next stop was the Sarchi Artists' Cooperative (mum! dad! we DID go there!) where we took our pictures next to the largest ox cart in the world. It strikes me as really funny that, of all the Guinness World Records to break, they would choose the biggest ox cart. Do what you know, man.
For lunch we stopped at a steakhouse...right at the foot of Arenal Volcano. I got my picture taken on the back of a giant cement bull with a ladder up one side of it. Tourism is everywhere! We ate lunch in the glorious humidity and watched the point of Arenal emerge (which is apparently a pretty rare occurence because of the rain, clouds, and smoke that usually surround it).
After lunch we went ziplining. I don't believe I have ever had such exhilarating fun in my life. My parents and sister did it when they were here last semester, but it's such a different experience doing it than just hearing about it. We harnessed up (and I got a double pulley to go even faster!), then trekked at a literally 60 degree angle up the side of the mountain to get to the first platform. I never really realized how out of shape I am until that moment. Here are some statistics: there were 12 ziplines. Some of them are 300 meters high. 10 guys got stuck in the middle. 4 girls cried. I saw 1 turkey (?). It rained 0 times...which sucks because I wore my fleece-ish lined raincoat the. Entire. Time. Better safe than sorry? More like, better faint from heat exhaustion at 300 meters above a raging waterfall of death.
After ziplining we got on horses. This felt like a random turn of events; in fact, I'm fairly certain that the horses were just pulled from the rainforest. They definitely weren't trained AT ALL. No one died, though, which is a good outcome.
Baldi Hot Springs was our next stop, which was awesome. We had dinner there, a buffet, then swam (the logic of "all you can eat, then swim" escapes me). The springs were gorgeous--it's kinda a resort, with 3 wet bars (though drinks are $10 each!) and pools ranging from coldish to comfy to boiling. Then we found the waterslides :) One was really fast, one was really slow, and one was really painful. I will only say that it ended badly.
On the way back from Baldi we stopped to see the volcano at night! I saw one sliver of lava snake out of one corner of the crater's mouth, and that's it....but they sell postcards that illustrate buckets and buckets o' liquid hot magma pouring of it, so it MUST be true!
On Sunday morning I woke up more sore than I have ever been in my life! The hiking, the ab crunching, the holding on for dear life when a strap on my harness broke (yes, indeed, it did), the neck cramps from falling asleep in a position I thought unassumable to mankind, and the near-concussing action of that damned waterslide all used their forces against me to make me rue the day I was born...or at least yesterday. We had breakfast at the hotel, then bussed to La Fortuna waterfall where we hiked 600 m down to the falls, swam in the foam underneath it (SO COLD compared to the hot springs!), fed frogs to piranhas (I did not partake in this, but attempted to feed them my fingertips instead, which in retrospect was a disaster waiting to happen), then hiked back up. I wish i could say the hike back up was a breeze and that I did the whole thing while carrying on a conversation with my neighbor. In reality, I'm just going to leave it at this: it was the exact opposite.
I bought one of those cool wrap tapestry things, partially because it had birds on it, and partially because I only brought one outit that had already seen me sweat bullets in a ski jacket in a rainforest canopy AND ride horses AND sleep for hours in a bus...so I was starting to stink. Obviously. Literally, people would not sit next to me on the bus. Haha, more room for me :)
We stopped at a rope swing on the way back from La Fortuna where we made fools of ourselves in deep water. One guy, who can't swim, swung from the rope and landed almost on top of the goggled guy who was there to help push him to shore. Fun times :P
We got back to the hotel and laid in the sun for an hour while our lunch was being prepared. I saw 4 separate landslides down the sides of Arenal--it was so bizarre because you could hear them before you could see them, then all you saw was layers of dust and concentric cirlces where boulders were falling and leaving pockmarks on Arenal's skin. It was awesome. Lunch was (brace yourself) heart of palm salad, grilled sea bass, coconut flan, and strawberry juice. :) Everyone popped a dramamine so we could sleep on the bus, then headed back south. On the way back we stopped for guava, which comes in a seedpod the size of my arm. You suck the white meat off the seed, and Percy compares it to "putting a white mouse in your mouth." Thanks, Percy. We also tried yucca bread, which is awesome, and pariña (i think), which is like a giant hard crusty pancake that you eat with molasses. Yum.
The change of climate from Heredia to Alajuela really messed with my head--I haven't felt this lethargic since November. I need to perk up, though, because we have 3 dance lessons, a cooking class, a jewelry class, an opera, a trip to Cafe Britt, and a 3-day, 2-night beach trip planned for this week...not to mention 5 classes and an exam. Ugh! Wish me luck.
Also, a shoutout.
15.5.09
Marqua! Marqua! Puta Negra!
Last night we went to a soccer game. No--it wasn't JUST a game; it was the semifinals. Our whole group bought tickets for $8 each, then trooped over to the stadium in the smallest bus I've ever seen. We had to sit in each other's laps. It was hilarious :)
The game was a ton of fun--it's been a long time since I've watched a sports game willingly, and an even longer time since I've watched someone else play soccer, not just my team from the bench. We got frisked before we walked in because we were forbidden from bringing coins in to the stadium for fear we'd throw them at players. When we got inside, though, vendors were selling chips and drinks for 300 colonnes, so if you paid with the smallest bill you had---1000--you got at least 700 colonnes in change....which was then thrown onto the field. Smart people.
The ticos behind us spent the whole time yelling things like "Puta negra!" (black bitch) and "Come mierda!" (eat shit). Two men were arrested. Four people left on stretchers. It was a great time :)
A couple days ago I bought batteries (I told you guys about them--the void-of-power ones) and yesterday I decided to return them to the store (named El Amigo Merveilloso--the marvelous friend) where I bought them for less than $.50. I didn't know the return policy, so I just walked in with them in hand and said, "These don't work. Money please?" The woman looked at me incredulously, then kept doing what she was doing for a good 5 minutes. Seeing that I wasn't going away, she "humph"ed audibly, then snatched the batteries and handed them to a young guy employee, who stuffed them in this lightbulb contraption they use to test batteries. Nothing happened. I think it's hilarious that they probably had so many batteries not work that they had to get a contraption to test them. She opened the cash register and gave me my 325 colonnes ultra-grudgingly, then I went on my merry way. Had I been able to bring coins into the stadium, I would have bought a drink and thought of that frumpy sourpuss Amiga Merveillosa.
In class my professor asked us to say things we'd never done using the preterito perfecto sense, which basically says, "This has never happened and is not happening now, but there's a possibility that it will happen in the future." I said I'd never given money to a homeless person. It's basically true--I've given them food, and I've given money to the legless ones, but I consider them veterans...but I'd run out of "I've never been an only child" and "I've never lived in Antarctica." Anyway, Professora told me that, when you park on the side of the road, if there is a homeless person there wearing an orange reflective vest, you are required to give him money. Well, you're not required, but it's in your best interest--he's known as the Watchman, and he's in cahoots with the gangs who steal cars, so if you give him money, he'll protect your car. If you don't pay him, he'll smile and say, "Gracias," but when you come back out from work, you will not have a car.
My host mum watches this really interesting recurring documentary thing called "Sin Senos No Hay Paraiso"--Without Breasts, There Is No Paradise. Last night's installment was about a young woman who wanted to go to college, but none of the administrators would give her the time of day because she was--not homely, but not necessarily well-endowed. She had plastic surgery, breast enchancement, and it closed doors all around her because now, everyone in the college administration thinks she's a prostitute. Pretty sad, and, incredibly, true.
Today we have our first exam. It's going to be oral, and basically what B and I are doing is presenting our research for our final project on Argentina. Speaking of which--I need to do that research :l Hasta mañana!
The game was a ton of fun--it's been a long time since I've watched a sports game willingly, and an even longer time since I've watched someone else play soccer, not just my team from the bench. We got frisked before we walked in because we were forbidden from bringing coins in to the stadium for fear we'd throw them at players. When we got inside, though, vendors were selling chips and drinks for 300 colonnes, so if you paid with the smallest bill you had---1000--you got at least 700 colonnes in change....which was then thrown onto the field. Smart people.
The ticos behind us spent the whole time yelling things like "Puta negra!" (black bitch) and "Come mierda!" (eat shit). Two men were arrested. Four people left on stretchers. It was a great time :)
A couple days ago I bought batteries (I told you guys about them--the void-of-power ones) and yesterday I decided to return them to the store (named El Amigo Merveilloso--the marvelous friend) where I bought them for less than $.50. I didn't know the return policy, so I just walked in with them in hand and said, "These don't work. Money please?" The woman looked at me incredulously, then kept doing what she was doing for a good 5 minutes. Seeing that I wasn't going away, she "humph"ed audibly, then snatched the batteries and handed them to a young guy employee, who stuffed them in this lightbulb contraption they use to test batteries. Nothing happened. I think it's hilarious that they probably had so many batteries not work that they had to get a contraption to test them. She opened the cash register and gave me my 325 colonnes ultra-grudgingly, then I went on my merry way. Had I been able to bring coins into the stadium, I would have bought a drink and thought of that frumpy sourpuss Amiga Merveillosa.
In class my professor asked us to say things we'd never done using the preterito perfecto sense, which basically says, "This has never happened and is not happening now, but there's a possibility that it will happen in the future." I said I'd never given money to a homeless person. It's basically true--I've given them food, and I've given money to the legless ones, but I consider them veterans...but I'd run out of "I've never been an only child" and "I've never lived in Antarctica." Anyway, Professora told me that, when you park on the side of the road, if there is a homeless person there wearing an orange reflective vest, you are required to give him money. Well, you're not required, but it's in your best interest--he's known as the Watchman, and he's in cahoots with the gangs who steal cars, so if you give him money, he'll protect your car. If you don't pay him, he'll smile and say, "Gracias," but when you come back out from work, you will not have a car.
My host mum watches this really interesting recurring documentary thing called "Sin Senos No Hay Paraiso"--Without Breasts, There Is No Paradise. Last night's installment was about a young woman who wanted to go to college, but none of the administrators would give her the time of day because she was--not homely, but not necessarily well-endowed. She had plastic surgery, breast enchancement, and it closed doors all around her because now, everyone in the college administration thinks she's a prostitute. Pretty sad, and, incredibly, true.
Today we have our first exam. It's going to be oral, and basically what B and I are doing is presenting our research for our final project on Argentina. Speaking of which--I need to do that research :l Hasta mañana!
14.5.09
Cultural Discrepanices, and Other Fun Happenings
Today I made a list of all the things I'm craving. La voila:
1. pickles
2. rhubarb
3. French cheese
4. French kiss
Yesterday at the grocery store I asked Professora what the word for granny panties was. She informed me that they were "matapaciones"---passion killers. Word.
Today we learned five Spanish verb tenses. Tomorrow we have our first exam--it's oral. Tonight, we're going to a futbol game. Tomorrow, my host mum is taking me to buy a Spanish copy of 100 Years of Solitude.
I don't have much to say today. It was gorgeous, and then it rained. Also, I saw a documentary about painted hands. It sounds lame, but srsly. Awesome. Also, I bought 21 postcards for $2.
Time to go to the soccer game, then this weekend--Arenal Volcano :)
1. pickles
2. rhubarb
3. French cheese
4. French kiss
Yesterday at the grocery store I asked Professora what the word for granny panties was. She informed me that they were "matapaciones"---passion killers. Word.
Today we learned five Spanish verb tenses. Tomorrow we have our first exam--it's oral. Tonight, we're going to a futbol game. Tomorrow, my host mum is taking me to buy a Spanish copy of 100 Years of Solitude.
I don't have much to say today. It was gorgeous, and then it rained. Also, I saw a documentary about painted hands. It sounds lame, but srsly. Awesome. Also, I bought 21 postcards for $2.
Time to go to the soccer game, then this weekend--Arenal Volcano :)
13.5.09
Las Tres Mujeres
This morning we had to be up at the buttcrack of dawn to drive to San Jose, where I 8inevitably) bought a hammock, and the batteries I bought yesterday at the Costa Rican equivalent of Dollar General (inevitably) were void of battery acid and, thus, a waste of nearly fifty cents. I HATE stealing pictures from friends worse than just about anything, but when I'm without a camera...well, it's (barely) better than nothing.
We visited Teatro Nacional where Dr. B and I are going to see an opera later, then the national museum where I scouted out el mariposera--the butterfly garden :) I recounted the story of when we wrote our names on the chrysali(ses) and, when the butterflies' wings unfolded, they said our names. It's one of my favorite stories because no one believes it.
After the morning in San Jose and a super-heavy lunch, we headed back to class. Seriously, Worst Time Ever--I want a nap! My professora noticed that Dr. B and I were dragging, so she took us on an adventure :) We hopped in her car and went to the grocery store, Pali (suspiciously close to mi nombre), then talked about going to the park and drinking something; Professora and Dr. B both had mangoes, I had a hammock, we had a bottle of wine--we were good to go! "Dos mangos, una hamaka, una botella de vino--las tres mujeres!" Magic ensued.
We drove into the mountains and looked down on Heredia from above--it's amazing how far we could get without actually going very far. We found a resort, Refranes, that rocked my world--it's basically all my dream houses all rolled into one. Apparently you can rent a room for $50 a night, which has two beds, two couches, a kitchen, and includes dinner in a romantic restaurant that wraps around a lake; there were bromiliads and hibiscuses and hummingbirds all over the place, plus birds of paradise and little fountains and more Spanish tiles than even I knew what to do with. I was in heaven. Las dos mujeres made of me because I took so many pictures (after buying less shit-tastic batteries) but hey, I like what I like.
We got back right after the bell rang (after stopping back at the grocery store for some Maltisomething-or-other--it's a children's drink that tastes like beer and maple syrup) then left immediately to go to a just-for-homestays dinner at an Argentinian restaurant that is, literally, around the corner from my homestay. I have never eaten a steak so fiercely delicate in my life. I'm still bathing in the afterglow.
Now I'm at la escuela, doing one last email check before we Ladies hit the town again (every night is ladies' night!) The foreign students (which I suppose we all are) take English classes at night, so it's hilarious hearing all kinds of accents saying, "It is in the refrigerator. Bryan is in the kitchen!"
Tomorrow we've got dance class again...and I am sooooo excited! I can't wait to get home and teach Mister how to dance salsa and cumbia and bachata and meringue. Then again, another part of me--an equally big part--could wait forever to leave this place.
We visited Teatro Nacional where Dr. B and I are going to see an opera later, then the national museum where I scouted out el mariposera--the butterfly garden :) I recounted the story of when we wrote our names on the chrysali(ses) and, when the butterflies' wings unfolded, they said our names. It's one of my favorite stories because no one believes it.
After the morning in San Jose and a super-heavy lunch, we headed back to class. Seriously, Worst Time Ever--I want a nap! My professora noticed that Dr. B and I were dragging, so she took us on an adventure :) We hopped in her car and went to the grocery store, Pali (suspiciously close to mi nombre), then talked about going to the park and drinking something; Professora and Dr. B both had mangoes, I had a hammock, we had a bottle of wine--we were good to go! "Dos mangos, una hamaka, una botella de vino--las tres mujeres!" Magic ensued.
We drove into the mountains and looked down on Heredia from above--it's amazing how far we could get without actually going very far. We found a resort, Refranes, that rocked my world--it's basically all my dream houses all rolled into one. Apparently you can rent a room for $50 a night, which has two beds, two couches, a kitchen, and includes dinner in a romantic restaurant that wraps around a lake; there were bromiliads and hibiscuses and hummingbirds all over the place, plus birds of paradise and little fountains and more Spanish tiles than even I knew what to do with. I was in heaven. Las dos mujeres made of me because I took so many pictures (after buying less shit-tastic batteries) but hey, I like what I like.
We got back right after the bell rang (after stopping back at the grocery store for some Maltisomething-or-other--it's a children's drink that tastes like beer and maple syrup) then left immediately to go to a just-for-homestays dinner at an Argentinian restaurant that is, literally, around the corner from my homestay. I have never eaten a steak so fiercely delicate in my life. I'm still bathing in the afterglow.
Now I'm at la escuela, doing one last email check before we Ladies hit the town again (every night is ladies' night!) The foreign students (which I suppose we all are) take English classes at night, so it's hilarious hearing all kinds of accents saying, "It is in the refrigerator. Bryan is in the kitchen!"
Tomorrow we've got dance class again...and I am sooooo excited! I can't wait to get home and teach Mister how to dance salsa and cumbia and bachata and meringue. Then again, another part of me--an equally big part--could wait forever to leave this place.
12.5.09
What did I tell you--
I woke up, as predicted, at 7:22 after a ragingly thrilling Ladies' Night. We met up at the school, caught a cab (an adventure in itself) to Fofo, then reaped the benefits of four free vodka-y-jugo-de-naranja. Scooooooorrrrre.
I realized recently that I only brought, like, 4 pairs of underwear, so I've been freeballin--or, as my friend Malicious says, freecoochin', which is a revolting and oddly satisfying alternative--moer than usual. Okay, maybe not more than usual, but it feels different when it's out of necesity. TMI I'm certain.
Walked to school, finished my first days' homework of a 15 miunte oral presentation (my friends H and K said "That's what you get for being smart!" Is it too awful for me to admit that I actually enjoy the work?) and had some tea. Thank God! Costa Ricans like tea! I meant to pack my own, forgot, got sad, got to the school, realized they had some, then got happy. You'd think I was menopausal or something, all those emotions :l
Today's dance lesson was optional, but surprisingly enough, all of the guys showed up! I won't even offer excuses like "they're only there to see us girls shake our asses," I'm just impressed they were there, period. We learned salsa today, which rocked my world. If you want to see something hilarious and juvenile, ask to see my foot diagrams so I can remember which dance is which. Go on, ask me.
I ate lunch with Dr. B, a woman who shares my pechant for adventure. Advenchant! Penventure! We wanted to eat at Mamis, a Carribbean restaurant that everyone and their mother simply raves about. Obviously it really IS good, because it opens at 11 and when we got there at 11:04, it was packed. Literally, no tables free, at all. We ended up eating sandwiches at Cafe Flores which was fine, then trekked around Heredia like theer's no tomorrow. Apparently, the people here think there isn't--literally, the main difference between Americans and Latinos is our perspective: we see things in terms of the future, and they see everything through the lens of the past.
We have class every day from 1:30-5:30, which is tough because that is prime nap time in Kali Land! Maybe that's why they stock so much coffee and black tea...Today, though, I learned something interesting. Compared to America's 50%--or some other equally ridiculous percentage--divorce rate, Costa Rica boasts a 30% or lower rate. In fact, it gets lower every year. Why? This is a primarily Catholic country. If people want children, they get married. But more and more couples are deciding they don't want kids--in fact, the average number of children per Tico household is 1.2--so, they're not getting married. Literally, Professora V told us that it's extremely rare to see a wedding in Costa Rica. People have stopped getting married! One good thing about this is, thy've stopped getting divorced, too ;)
I noticed something awesome as I was walking back to my house today: my depth perception is improving! I walked out into the street as a car was coming, saw that it was in front of me and started walking so I could cut behind it, and my trajectory DIDN'T send me sprawling into the tail end of someone else's car. Improving every day, my friends--improving every day :)
I realized recently that I only brought, like, 4 pairs of underwear, so I've been freeballin--or, as my friend Malicious says, freecoochin', which is a revolting and oddly satisfying alternative--moer than usual. Okay, maybe not more than usual, but it feels different when it's out of necesity. TMI I'm certain.
Walked to school, finished my first days' homework of a 15 miunte oral presentation (my friends H and K said "That's what you get for being smart!" Is it too awful for me to admit that I actually enjoy the work?) and had some tea. Thank God! Costa Ricans like tea! I meant to pack my own, forgot, got sad, got to the school, realized they had some, then got happy. You'd think I was menopausal or something, all those emotions :l
Today's dance lesson was optional, but surprisingly enough, all of the guys showed up! I won't even offer excuses like "they're only there to see us girls shake our asses," I'm just impressed they were there, period. We learned salsa today, which rocked my world. If you want to see something hilarious and juvenile, ask to see my foot diagrams so I can remember which dance is which. Go on, ask me.
I ate lunch with Dr. B, a woman who shares my pechant for adventure. Advenchant! Penventure! We wanted to eat at Mamis, a Carribbean restaurant that everyone and their mother simply raves about. Obviously it really IS good, because it opens at 11 and when we got there at 11:04, it was packed. Literally, no tables free, at all. We ended up eating sandwiches at Cafe Flores which was fine, then trekked around Heredia like theer's no tomorrow. Apparently, the people here think there isn't--literally, the main difference between Americans and Latinos is our perspective: we see things in terms of the future, and they see everything through the lens of the past.
We have class every day from 1:30-5:30, which is tough because that is prime nap time in Kali Land! Maybe that's why they stock so much coffee and black tea...Today, though, I learned something interesting. Compared to America's 50%--or some other equally ridiculous percentage--divorce rate, Costa Rica boasts a 30% or lower rate. In fact, it gets lower every year. Why? This is a primarily Catholic country. If people want children, they get married. But more and more couples are deciding they don't want kids--in fact, the average number of children per Tico household is 1.2--so, they're not getting married. Literally, Professora V told us that it's extremely rare to see a wedding in Costa Rica. People have stopped getting married! One good thing about this is, thy've stopped getting divorced, too ;)
I noticed something awesome as I was walking back to my house today: my depth perception is improving! I walked out into the street as a car was coming, saw that it was in front of me and started walking so I could cut behind it, and my trajectory DIDN'T send me sprawling into the tail end of someone else's car. Improving every day, my friends--improving every day :)
11.5.09
Hola from Costa Rica!
I flew in yesterday and--after entirely too many hours in an airport-slash-airplane (also, please ask about the 50-something couple who engaged in a slap fight on my plane--go on, ask!)--I am HERE! Heredia is beautiful--it has that urban decay feel that I love so much (and lack so profoundly in the states).
My host mum is ridicucool (is it ok for me to make a portmanteau o those words? We're going to go with yes :) also, many congratulations to me as I JUST figured out how' to' use' the' apo'stro'phe!). She showed up to pick me up in a halter top, tight jeans, and covered in body glitter. My first thoughts? "I and this bedazzled Tica are going to be bestest estest friends." <--double quotes! Ballin' :)
We had our placement tests today (I placed into advanced, which came as a huge surprise) and then we had our first Latin dance lesson. These lessons are required, which rocks my world--all these alcoholic lacrosse guys, shaking their hips, nursing their hangovers to ultraloud latin music? Yes, please ;) Today we learned meringue, and tomorrow is salsa--I can never keep the moves straight, but it's nice to practice with people who know what they're doing, entirely unlike myself :)
Afterwards we toured Heredia and saw all the must-sees--the safe banks with no lines, the park, the clubs. In fact, one of the clubs we passed advertised Ladies' Night every Monday where Ladies drink absolutely free. Hey--I'M a lady! It's Monday! Take a wild guess where we're going tonight :)
We ate lunch at a little cafe called Fresias (I think) where I drank guanaba (doodooodoodoodoooo!) for the second time in my life. Rock my world, guanabana. Go on, rock it.
After lunch we started our classes--I'm in class with one other girl from my school, one professor who came with us, and the Costa Rican professor. It's small and intimate and crazy-intense, though we only have classes from 1:30-4:30 every day. YESSSSSSSS, no waking up before noon! Though we all know me, I'll be up at 7:30 every day, raring to go explore some uncharted quartier.
Not that there's anything wrong with that--it's just a symptom of my wanderlust :)
My host mum is ridicucool (is it ok for me to make a portmanteau o those words? We're going to go with yes :) also, many congratulations to me as I JUST figured out how' to' use' the' apo'stro'phe!). She showed up to pick me up in a halter top, tight jeans, and covered in body glitter. My first thoughts? "I and this bedazzled Tica are going to be bestest estest friends." <--double quotes! Ballin' :)
We had our placement tests today (I placed into advanced, which came as a huge surprise) and then we had our first Latin dance lesson. These lessons are required, which rocks my world--all these alcoholic lacrosse guys, shaking their hips, nursing their hangovers to ultraloud latin music? Yes, please ;) Today we learned meringue, and tomorrow is salsa--I can never keep the moves straight, but it's nice to practice with people who know what they're doing, entirely unlike myself :)
Afterwards we toured Heredia and saw all the must-sees--the safe banks with no lines, the park, the clubs. In fact, one of the clubs we passed advertised Ladies' Night every Monday where Ladies drink absolutely free. Hey--I'M a lady! It's Monday! Take a wild guess where we're going tonight :)
We ate lunch at a little cafe called Fresias (I think) where I drank guanaba (doodooodoodoodoooo!) for the second time in my life. Rock my world, guanabana. Go on, rock it.
After lunch we started our classes--I'm in class with one other girl from my school, one professor who came with us, and the Costa Rican professor. It's small and intimate and crazy-intense, though we only have classes from 1:30-4:30 every day. YESSSSSSSS, no waking up before noon! Though we all know me, I'll be up at 7:30 every day, raring to go explore some uncharted quartier.
Not that there's anything wrong with that--it's just a symptom of my wanderlust :)
4.3.09
Alphabet: A Desecration of Words
for my Aunt Martha
Consider this written with twenty-six
letters, a puckered mouth moist with stashed vowels.
I remember the scent of your name.
The thick ridge of blue-black consonants,
crisp M's and S's suspended on pages
of lace. First, middle, maiden, last,
chalked on naked walls--everyone
knows nothing exists in darkness.
A halogen glow on straw hair,
on lingering, restless eyes.
The unexpected smoothness
of linseed oil. The pastel almond glimmer
of half-moon fingernails knuckle-deep
in soapy water, hot enough to cauterize.
Your metropolis of blemishes, age spots. tender
beauty marks--a polymer of skin,
kneaded smooth by decades, eroded
by dented crochet hooks, knitting needles---
your slim lifelines embossed
by the smoky scent of talc and lemons.
Fresh, young. Delicate crinoline
wrinkles, crow's feet, Crohn's disease--
A calico swath. A turned-wood birdhouse.
A clenched jaw. A slipped wrist.
The coo, goodbye, of a grey-soft dove.
Twenty-six letters.
No words for you.
13.1.09
I Have Been Alive for Many Days
I wanted to count them all today, but I didn't.
*Great story Kalster! Tell it again!*
I have so many days to catch you up on! Last I posted was Day 9. So, Day 10: Meet Jonas Day. Basically, I just went to the website for the company that wrote the book, then got to meet one especially rockin' Swedish blogger named Jonas Jansson (I could have sworn his name had one of those o's with a line through it). I created another blog on that site, but no worries, it's nowhere near as phantasmagoric as this one.
Day 11: Introduce Yourself to Someone You Know but Never Speak to. This one was particularly hard for me. I know a lot of people, but I talk to them all the time. The Book suggested The Hooker on the Corner, The Guy Behind the Counter, etc. Since I spent the day driving back to the school, I encountered only people I don't know. I did, however, end up spending the night with a friend, and one of his friends was there, too, so I chose him as my lucky victim. I learned his sexual preference and his intended major. We got super close. Thanks, Ian.
Day 12: I chose my type from a list of types. You know, for those drunken parties, so I can remember. I am the Clever Brunette. Coincidentally enough, Night 12 was a drunken party, and I totally rocked the Clever Brunette. Of course, everyone was drunk, so no one noticed save me, but I won't let that get me down. After all, I'm a Clever Brunette--who doesn't want one?!
Day 13: Today. Send a Letter to a Mass Murderer Day. I perused the wares--Charles Manson, Theodore Kaczynski (Unabomber!), the Co-Ed Killer--and wondered, since This Book was published in 2003, how many of these have already been executed? I ended up choosing David Berkowitz, who had a troubled childhood, became a Satanist, and killed 6 people. Also, he looks particularly creepy. That's a big selling point.
I gave him a fake name, no return address, and I used a moist Q-tip to seal the envelope so that, in the event that Davey Boy has well-developed forensic skillz, he can't have a sample of my DNA.
This book is rockin' my world.
9.1.09
Self-Control vs. Control Top Panty Hose
Again, the title has nothing to do with anything.
Day 8: Addiction Free Day! They even include a caveat for crack cocaine addicts: "You may not feel purer immediately. Stick at this one for at least a couple months to see the full lifestyle benefits." So far I've gone all day without sugar just to prove how much purer I feel. Also, so far it's only 10:11 a.m.
Day 9:Do Something Before Breakfast Day. I went for a brisk jaunt around our house. I put my bare foot in a patch of hoarfrost. I tried to lick the morning dew from a young leaf, but it had already dried up. I took a shower. I scared a small family of birds. I finished my book.
Today has already been productive! This book is changing my life.
8.1.09
The Meaning of Being
I only titled it that because it rhymes, and I saw it on the cover of a book.
Day 5's task was to paste an "Out of Order" sign on some public infrastructure in the hope of achieving comprehensive social breakdown across the US. I posted it twice, in the unisex bathroom of an undisclosed location. I thought it would have a chance at staying there for a long time because the sign kinda looks like the undisclosed location's insignia, but when I went back to said location the next day the signs had been taken down. Wiley managers.
I did get to spend some more time wreaking havoc in the store, though, with C-Nilly (so silly). We stole the Call for Help button and hid it amongst the shelves and pressed it over and over, then went to see a movie (which was fantastic. We snuck snacks into the theatre--baby-sized Sprites, Xplosive Pizza goldfish, and chewy Sweetarts--so it wouldn't seem 3 hours long.) Afterwards we stole 3-D glasses from the bin and strutted through the parking lot with our own runway music. We also wore the glasses in the mall, which was pretty disconcerting, then ate at Genghis Grill (I think the chef is a legitimate Mongol) and watched a handful more movies at my house. It was a swell day.
Day 6: Write the opening sentence of your début novel. Mine goes a little something like this:
"It could have been anybody, those silhouettes in the photo, a regular Jack-and-Jill cut from black cardstock and tacked to a fire-engine sunset. But it wasn't. It was you with me; I had sun poisoning and after the shutter snapped--I mean seconds later--I barfed on the craggy, pockmarked boulders at the lakeshore, and that late-July, north-Georgia sunset made it sizzle before the light drained from the neon sky."
If you're interested in publishing the rest of it, give me several thousand dollars and a couple months and we'll see what we can do.
Day 7: Masturbate at 13:56 to the following fantasy.
Listed is a story about a woman trapped by a rainstorm in an isolated log cabin, rudely awakened by a rippling muscle-y woodsman, then swirled in a tale of bliss beyond imagination. The men's version says "Two blondes. Doing it. Together."
I put on some socks and played Flight of the Conchord's "Business Time." You can imagine the rest I'm sure. A couple friends that I had enlightened about the task sent me text messages reminding me that it was business time and asking how it was. Oh, friendship.
4.1.09
New Happy Year
I spent my New Year's vacation in Chicago, which I have never seen before, and which I immediately loved. Love love love. Chilly Chicago. Sushi, champagne, and two perfect gentlemen for a week's worth of company. Life is good.
I've also taken the opportunity to formulate some highly sensitive and classified New Year's resolutions. They are as follows:
1. Get really good at belly dancing.
2. Lose weight (for real this time) and get in shape.
3. Devour this book (which I have lovingly dubbed "365 Days of Hilarious Living") and post my daily findings.
Basically, the book is just a challenge to make every day about something: do something every day that makes it stand out, makes it interesting, or at least memorable. So, Day 1 is pretty simple: Choose one of the following and do it. Do one press-up; perform a strip tease (in private); triple-tie your shoelaces; learn to play <> on the piano; increase your typing speed by three words a minute; jaywalk in a pedestrian zone; set all your clocks to exactly the right time; whisper a white lie when no one's listening; fantasize about your partner; use a different thickness comb; say <> instead of <>; hold the phone up to your other ear; tell someone your middle name; try a new sandwich filling; leave work five minutes early; bookmark a new website; give your genitalia pet names; decide which one of your toes is the prettiest; insult an insect; go on a one-minute hunger strike.
The dabbler in me mixed with the over-achiever in me decided to do a little of everything. I did one full chin-up. I went to a strip club for the first time in my life and watched a real live person do a strip tease. I whispered "I'm a lesbian" on the escalator in the movie theater. I fantasized about having a partner. I couldn't decide if I was giving pet names to my genitalia or giving names to my pet genitalia; regardless, I did that years ago. I stuck up my middle toe (which is, coincidentally, the prettiest) and said "You're retarded" to a moth that was trapped in my car while the windows were down. I held the phone up to my other ear and it pretty much weirded me out for the whole day.
Day 2 (I'm just going to combine them all here so I can start afresh tomorrow) told me to spend the day gazing at everyone as if he or she were the one true love of my life. I kinda have an addiction to people-watching anyway, so I just threw in a couple of eyelash bats and stoic winks and went from there. I received no digits, nor reciprocated Looks of Anguished Love, but it's the thought that counts. Not that anyone else was walking around gazing at everyone as if he or she were the one true love of their life. Or were they...
Day 3 told me to throw something away that I like. I haven't done this yet. I'm stuck on analyzing why I like what I like, and why I would ever throw it away, and if I did, would I ever forgive myself. I'll keep you posted.
Day 4 (which is today!!!) is World Coloring-In Day. I colored in a world map all the countries I have visited (green), the ones I intend to visit in the next year (blue), the ones I intend to visit before I die (yellow) (what happens if I die within the next year?! What color do I color the country?!?), and the countries I never want to visit (red). Needless to say, the map is entirely yellow and green, with no red anywhere. Here, see for yourself.
Now that I'm landlocked for awhile I'll be documenting my hysterically lived life through this book. Until I can once again be on the open road, this will just have to suffice.
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